The first picture of all four of us LEWIS kids in over 27 years!

Saturday - June 1, 2002

I got up at 3:30am this morning and finished getting my things packed. We left the house at 4:08 and went by the Shell Station to get a drink for Mitch. We made it to Sacramento at around 5:30am. I was able to get my new ticket issued using confirmation #UNVJQJ, but it took a bit of time. The people at the counter had never had to do this before and they had to get a manual out to figure it all out. They frisked me before getting on the flight to Denver.

We got on the plane and everything went as expected. I tried to doze off, but kept snoring and Skip would poke me awake. We landed in Denver on schedule (about 1 hr and 50 minutes). In the Denver airport we went to the Aviator's Club. I had 2 Bloody Mary's with an extra shot for $14.50 (including tip) and didn't even feel them. That sucked. We rushed back to catch our flight from gate A52 to St. Louis and were nearly late again. This time they frisked Skip.

We arrived in St. Louis with no problem a few minutes after 2pm. We caught the MetroLink and and made it home with no problems. Calisa wanted me to and let them know that we arrived safely, but no one would answer the phone. I called her cell phone, but it was out of range or not on. I called Jack and caught him at home. He has to work tonight, but will call me tomorrow.

I was great getting home again. Kira was ecstatic to see me... and I was no less happy to see her. Barnabas stayed in hiding for quite some time, but finally came out and started giving both Skip and I more attention than I am used to!

I took Kira for her walk and found a perfectly good set of decorative shelves sitting by the disposal chute.

I tried to take a nap. I waned to go out later, but I was too tired. I dozed off for a few minutes, but woke up again very shorly. I got up and began catching up my email and my JOURNAL site. It has been a lot of work.

Helen contacted me on-line tonight, and shortly thereafter, Scott called from Arkansas at 9:40p. He should be in St. Louis tomorrow. We are going to try to connect for the first time!

Billy also called me. They are going to Six Flags tomorrow. I REALLY wanted to go too! But I did not realize the event was THIS weekend <sad face>. Plus, I am supposed to do something with Jack and now Scott both tomorrow. I have been drinking rum tonight too. I hope I can even deal with the sunlight tomorrow!! <smile>

We ordered Pizza from Pappa John's for supper tonight. Here goes the heart burn!!!

Sunday - June 2, 2002

12:47a - I have been working on my journal site all evening. Its about time for bed!!

8:04a - I was awakened this morning by what I thought was a lawn mower outside. Then I got to thinking... I am 23 floors up in downtown St. Louis. There is not that much lawn nearby to mow. Out of curiosity, I got up and looked out the window. There was a big red & white helicopter across the street helping the construction crew on the building the are remodeling! What a strange site that was.

8:07a - Time to take Kira for her morning walk. As much as I love her, I did enjoy the time away from this daily chore!

Jack and I went out for lunch at Ryan's today. He got kind of lost trying to get there and we ended up in Illinois, but we finally found it. Scott called me while we were eating and said he was over at 182 East Grand Avenue. We finished eating and Jack drove us over there. We found him easily... too bad we didn't find the restaurant the easy!

We took Scott over to Union Station where we wandered about, had some coffee and such. Scott got his caricature done by an artist there. It was a pleasant outing, but I was sure getting tired.

I opened one of the letters which came in while we were gone. It was from the Courthouse; reminding me of my court date on the 6th. I finally got that creep's name as one "Charles Nemitz." It bothered me to see the name "Nemitz" ... the name of an American hero, associated with the poor excuse for a human being. He will not be present during my questioning (which is fine with me).

Jack called me around 8pm and wanted to go out. I was hesitant, but agreed. He tried to take a shortcut over to Clem's and we ended up in Illinois again! Anyway, we finally go there and ended up playing pool for much of the evening. I actually enjoyed myself. I haven't played pool in years.

Monday - June 3, 2002

7:37a - This will be my first day of work in 2 weeks. I am ready... though I could have slept a few more hours! Skip called in last night and did not got to work (wimp!).

8:28a - I am going to start trying to lose weight... starting today! I weighed in at 223½ lbs this morning. I have got to quit "talking" and start "doing" !!

I just had a banana and some beef jerky (97% fat free) for breakfast. But Lisa Z. and Sonya called me around lunch and offered to bring Chinese food back. I was going to get just some Hot & Sour Soup, but they had no soups! I finally settle for "Hot Braised Chicken (boneless)." It was not what I was thinking at all, but I ate it. It was not exactly dietetic.

I made some homemade masa patties for supper. They were better than expected, but not that great. Just ate a few bites.

I got ALL the pictures scanned in that I brought back from California. A total of 22 sets. I put them all on CD and am tediously going through them all doing clean up work and making annotations. Slow but rewarding work.

Tuesday - June 4, 2002

8:06a - I got up late... I fell back to sleep. No time to write more. Must take Kira out and get ready for work.

8:31a - Kira saw a squirrel this morning. That made her day.

8:40a - I just notice that I have a peanut plant sprouting in one of my planters!

I am still holding at 223½ lbs. I had a little snack bowl of peaches for breakfast and a salad for lunch. I bought some bananas when I got home. I was famished and ate one while walking Kira. (That big Akita was out again... on the elevator). I fixed a can of spinach with a small amount of leftover rice in it. Later I was still hungry and I put on some water to boil. I added some chicken flavor, butter flavor (not real butter, but the low fat powder) and some other seasonings. I added some onions & bell pepper mix for texture and a little bit more of the left over rice. It should be fairly low in fat & calories.

Wednesday - June 5, 2002

8:21a - I turned my alarm off accidentally this morning. I am running 40 minutes behind schedule!

8:46a - It was so hot when I got home last night that I was sweating like the proverbial pig, but this morning it is actually cool out! ...and raining slightly.

8:48a - I am still holding steadily at 223½. I can't seem to even lose ½ pound!

I just had spinanch, carrots and such for supper tonight. Still holding to the diet. So far.

Thursday - June 6, 2002

I went to testify before the Grand Jury today. I was scheduled for noon. I got there about 11:25 and they took me right in. I was on my way to work by 11:46! That was unexpected.

WEIGHT: 223.5

Lisa Z. was on vacation today, it was just Gary and I till 2:30.

Had to loan Calisa some money today using Western Union on-line. This is not good. Jack is going to have to borrow money at the end of the month. I am glad I can help, but this all concerns me greatly. I am having to put all my plans on hold.

Jack and I went out tonight. I did enjoy myself.

Friday - June 7, 2002
Happy Birthday to Angie of Nik's Wine Bar!

7:42a - I feel like crap this morning! Oh... just remembered, I have some White Castle food around here somewhere. I was sure I did not eat it all last night! Oh, I almost forgot. We went out for sushi at Seki! How could I forget that? It was a delicious meal, and still fairly low fat. I got the Una Ju "Sushi" platter. Jack got a White Fish meal and swears the fish was the best he has ever had in his life. I had a little bite of it and it was quite tasty, but I did not have enough of it to make such a judgment.

WEIGHT: 223.25

This was a busy day at work. Lisa Z. was on a vacation day and I was by myself. I logged 51 calls today out of 53 total logged calls. Lotus Notes was unusable for reasons unknown all day. I had to use iNotes on the internet to manage the Help Desk email. What a pain.

I felt awful (but increasingly better) from out outing last night and just threw the dieting concept out the window for a while. I had a soft taco at lunch. But I have still stuck to having no sugar drinks; only diet soda or water.

I got home and ate the left over White Castle's. I also got my "Lee's Place" updated at least partially. Then I turned out the lights and lay down to sleep until Skip got up. I almost dozed off... I never can sleep on the sofa.

Saturday - June 8, 2002

8:45a - I feel great this morning. So refreshed. I am supposed to get my hair cut at 11:30. I also laid out a roast (beef I think) to cook today. I hope it's sufficiently thawed. Now I had better take Kira out for her walk. I think I will walk around the block a ways.

WEIGHT: 223 (just a fraction over)

11:00a - I almost missed my hair appointment with Josephine this morning. I thought my appointment was at 11:30a. I call at 10:45 to verify.... and found out it was at 11:00! I only had 15 minutes left to get there. I through my self together in 5 minutes and ran for the elevator. There are only 2 of them working this weekend, So I had to wait a bit. When it arrived, there was guy on the elevator with a big wide-screen TV set. He said he was throwing it away; it was too blurry. I said I would take it, so we went back up (wasting more precious minutes) and I called Skip on my cell and had him meet us at the elevator. Then I headed back out for my haircut appointment.

I was just walking in front of the Salon when my phone rang. It was Josephine, looking for me! I was very funny when she asked me if I was going to be there and I walked through the front door and answered her! We were still both on the phone. Everyone got a laugh out of that. I like this haircut best I think.

The roast was done when I got home. It was delicious. I had planned on cooking it on a rack with foil over it, but was out of foil. There were some oven bags, so I used one of those and mixed in some veggies. It worked well enough.

I went swimming in the pool for the first time this year. It was a bit chilly, but very refreshing. I felt so good today. The day was beautiful, I had a fresh haircut, new clothes, I had lost a little weight (I know, just a half pound), I owe no one money.... I just felt good.

I counted my loose coins this afternoon and counted $92.00! Later I went out to Clem's. Larry and Vern were there and we chatted a lot. They are fun to talk with. I still did not drink any "sugar-laden" soda; I just ordered Bacardi Limon & club sodas. I have not had a regular soda since last weekend.

Y'aadh' uut' uchm' uutaitne. Y'ond' on' aohe Y'aatg' omhe. Skip okw' iim' apy' aatche 2:00am ny' iith' ormaengne. Y'aasw' itsaengye ny' iith' arkd' aany' iith' ofsaafe ny' onyael' aim' unyerdaerwe.

Sunday - June 9, 2002

I felt yucky today from too much partying last night, but I still managed to get a lot accomplished. I got four loads of laundry done and cleaned the kitchen. I also finally got my clothes hung from the trip and the suitcases emptied.

I went to Walgreen's and spent too much money today. I got some health items, including some Ginkgo Biloba and Siberian Ginseng. Also got some Dexatrim (natural) to help with my weight loss goals.

I worked for several hours off & on today on my family tree. I have so much information it is going to take forever to get it all organized!

I went to bed around 11:00p and hope to get a good, sound night's sleep. Skip hurt his back yesterday when we were trying to place the TV set and it was still hurting him today. He called in and did not go to work tonight.

Monday - June 10, 2002

8:06a - I took one of those Dexatrim this morning along with some various other vitamins & such. We will see how it works. I got up on time this morning, but I have spent so much time catching up my diary that I am about running late again! It looks nice outside. I had better get Kira out there quick or I am going to be late.

8:40a - The elevator situation is ridiculous! Two of the are down and one of them was being used by the carpet guys (stopping on every floor). It took my a half hour to walk Kira! Now I am going to be late!

WEIGHT: 223 (despite eating too much this weekend!). Today I had a banana for breakfast, a salad for lunch and for supper I had a few baby carrots, a can of sauerkraut, and a can of corn mixed with a quarter cup of cooked rice and some onion/bell pepper mix. I also had some red wine

This was a busy Monday. I logged 42 calls.

Got 3 or for more sets of photos processed tonight. I have 9 sets remaining to process.

Skip's back is doing better and he went to work tonight. I hope this does not become a serious problem.

Tuesday - June 11, 2002

7:41a - I am up earlier this morning. I want to have a head start on those darn elevators. I am chatting with Teklah on line too. She may be in St. Louis the first week of July during the same time frame that Chuck is visiting. Maybe we can meet... that would be cool.

WEIGHT: 223½ lbs (I am not going to be discouraged. Its a minor fluxuation in the wrong direction, but perfectly normal and to be expected.)

8:12a - It did not take as long to walk Kira this morning.

I noticed this morning that I have a slight soreness in my throat. I hope it is not going to develop into anything.

I started reading book #9 of Robert Jordan's "Wheel of Time" series today, having finished my Pip and Flinx book (Alan D. Foster) at lunch yesterday. I still haven't finished Lord of the Rings yet. Almost, but not quite.

11:35p - I made some Mung beans and rice for supper. I also ate some more sauerkraut. Boy... that stuff sure does clear out one's system!

I am getting slightly upset with work. I have actually entertained the thought of looking for another position. It's not that bad yet, but I will not accept working for a place where I "dread" going to work. I have done that before and its a miserable life. I am confident I cold find a job making even more than I do now. I am not pleased with the way things are going, and I feel I am not being taken seriously. However, I began working on my 'ss

11:41p - I got 2 more sets of pictures processed for he "old photos project" tonight.

Wednesday - June 12, 2002
Happy Birthday to Sam Bizarro in Deltona!

7:39a - I still have that soreness on the left side of my throat. It's no better nor worse.

WEIGHT: 223 lbs (slightly less!)

I was in a bad mood all day today. I wanted pizza for lunch, but I refrained and had a salad again. I only logged 29 calls today compared to 42 calls yesterday. And I was by myself a lot today compared to yesterday when we had me Lisa and Gary all working. Tuesday was obviously a much heavier call day.

Jack called me on my cell phone around 5:30. I had already decided I was going to go have a few drinks after work, so it was perfect timing. He picked me up and we went to Clem's and had a few drinks. Then we went back to my place so I could walk Kira. We went over to the Arch grounds where I let Kira go for an exhausting run. Jack lay down on the grass and I guess he did not understand that I was making a "loop" and was not coming back that way. I kept yelling at him, but he just lay there. Kira and I went on back to the apartment. Jack has a key, so I figured he could find his way back. To our mutual surprise, he met Kira and I on the same elevator and we got back at the same time! And these are the kinds of things that I find newsworthy for my journal... how sad.

We decided to go out for supper. Jack wanted to go to a Mexican restaurant called "Chevy's." He got a bit turned around and we missed the desired exit. By the time we got to Chevy's it was 9:50pm. Much to our dismay, they were turning people away at the door! Jack and I were both so angry over this that we vow never to go back to the place. We have no clue how the food or service might be, since they did not care to take our money. Their loss!

So we went looking for another place and found ourselves down the road at "Macaroni's Grill." The place was very open and airy, with several large bouquets of white Gladiolas decorating the center of the restaurant. The decor was very tasteful with a mild and not overpowering Southwestern flavor. I tried to stick to my diet as much a possible and ordered the grilled salmon and a rice pilaf with shredded spinach. This was all with a bottle of Chianti. I was fabulous!! One of the best meal of my life. Oh... and I must mention our very nice waitres, Katie. I learned that she is Diné (Navajo), and her grandfather was a Code Talker! Too cool! It was also amusing that I had just been speaking to Jack about the plight of the Diné who are experiencing the most severe drought in history. He did not know the word Diné, it was mildly satisfying to have Katie "confirm" that I was not just making the term up (as I believe Jack may sometimes thinks I do).

I got home just shortly before Skip left for work, so we had a few minutes to discuss his getting written up at work. That is an unfortunate situation.

Thursday - June 13, 2002

8:02a - It's cloudy out this morning. Well... I spent the past half hour looking at the Vital Voice web page and catching up yesterday's journal entry. I am (again) running behind schedule this morning. <sigh>

WEIGHT: 223 lbs (slightly more?)

I came home tonight and had a little more wine at got more pictures processed. Only 4 sets left!

Then I decided to go over to the WS Hotel and have some sushi. Unfortunately, once again Gosun (aka "Kevin") had left early. As it turned out, Norma-Jean, an elderly lady who lives in my apartments sitting at the bar and I ended up chatting with her and having a few drinks. She obviously quite drunk and was so annoying to the bartender that he bought me a drink for distracting her from him! I had 2-3 drinks and decided to head home. Norma-Jean was going to leave to. I offered to walk her home. I thought I was going to have to carry her! As soon as she got off the bar chair she fell to the floor. It took three of us to get her up. I had her hold my arm and was able to get her back home with no further incident. Incidentally, she and her roommate, Dave, are the owners of "Sheba," the big Akita that attacked me and Kira a few months ago.

Friday - June 14, 2002

7:01p - I got up late this morning! I turned my darn alarm off (instead of hitting the snooze) again. I managed to make to work no later than about 9:45a.

7:03p - I was able to log 20 calls today. I did not diet at lunch either. I had a nice chicken sandwich, onion rings, and bowl of their "clam chowder soup." I don't know why the call it "chowder soup." Is it chowder or is it soup? Weird.

7:04p - I worked on my autobiography some more today.

7:06p - I am SO glad its finally Friday!! I think I will go out for something to eat tonight. Skip paid me rent money very promptly this morning. I am glad... I feel awkward asking for it and that in turns makes me feel angry at having been put in a situation where I feel awkward.

I went down to Hannegan's at LaClede's landing and had a few cocktails. I called Jack and he and Adam ended up hopping on the train and coming down to join me. Before they got there I had a shrimp cocktail. We moved to a table outside on the sidewalk once they arrived ... it was a beautiful evening! Later we tried to find another place to go to, but everyone wanted a $5 cover charge and it just wasn't worth it. So Jack and Adam got back on the train and I walked home. I was hungry by this time since the shrimp cocktail did not fill me at all. I decided to go to Clem's and have a bite to eat at their restaurant. Around 11:00p I took a cab down, but to my surprise and dismay, the restaurant had closed at 10:30! I sat there (fairly bored) and had 3 cocktails which were way too strong. I called another cab and headed home. Once home, I put on some rice with chicken & pork. That went wrong too... it just did not cook right. The rice was still crunchy (yuck). I ate a few bites of the meat out of it and just went to bed. It was already around 2:00 in the morning.

Saturday - June 15, 2002

I finally got myself out of bed and took Kira for her walk this morning. I sure did not feel like it. I tried to re-cook that rice mixture from last night, but it was just awful. No fixing it. I ate a bit more of it and then went to lay back down again. I thought I would take a nap, but I couldn't go to sleep even though I felt like I was about to fall asleep. Skip left to go shopping and I got myself back up and took a shower. It was about 11:00am when I left the house and headed to Tower Grove Park for the Pagan Picnic. It was very interesting. Lots of people and interesting vendors. I finally found the pentagram pendant that I have been looking for. It is made of English pewter with a bronze "grip" piece in center and a sapphire set in the very center. It is quite striking. I did not long. Shortly after the circle of the main ritual ended I headed home again. However, I decided to stop at Union Station for a bite to eat. I was such a beautiful day. Sunny, but not hot with a steady breeze blowing. It was close to perfect. I sat out by the "pond" at Hooligan's and ordered their grilled salmon, Caribbean style. It was tasty, but the rice that was served with it tasted sour. I didn't like it at all and told them so. Strange that I am having so much problem with rice lately!

My cherished pendant which will be stolen from me by Rickey P. in 2006

I tried to call Calisa on the way home, but no one answers.

9:42p - I have just been sitting around here at home. Skip is in the bed. I took Kira for her walk and she saw a squirrel in the garage and went ballistic. I thought she was going to choke herself trying to get away from me and go after that squirrel! Earlier today I went down the street to the little Chinese food place and got some fried shrimp (mostly batter), some chicken wings, and some hot & sour soup (they do a good job on the soup). I have been on the computer off & on all evening. I only have one set of pictures left to process! ...and there are only 3 photos in the set.

I watched "The Mummy" on TV tonight and now "The Mask" is on. I am bored and tired. I spent too much money yesterday and don't want to go out tonight. I keep craving something to eat, but I don't know what it is.

9:48 -I guess I will fix a glass of ice water and watch TV for a while now...

I finally went to bed around 12:30. Some horror movie called "Dog Soldiers" was on... it was getting real stupid.

Sunday - June 16, 2002

8:54a - Sunday is here. I looks like a nice day out. Skip found a TV tray stand this morning. It is nicer that the stand that came with my trays.

8:40p - I am on the phone with Calisa at the moment. We are discussing Calais' schedule in college.

8:42: - 'lisa wishes to clarify that it is 6:42p her time!!

8:46p - So... per 'lisa's ramblings... we should offer our congratulations to Mitch for winning the "The Crazy Tie" contest. Then he went to his Dad's church and won the "Father with the most children present" contest" !! His Dad (Jerry) then said, "It's your day to win!!"

9:21p - I just noticed that Colleen came back on line. We have been having the most pleasurable time on line today. She sent me a picture of Artemis B. Wingate. The first picture of him I have ever seen! And (as I realize in my conversation with Calisa, this is Father's Day!). What better day to get a picture of my father's grandfather who raised him like he was his father!

9:27p - Colleen is going to get some food.

9:29p - I am rendering down some liquids to make some rice. And continuing to drink some red wine. The movie "Star Trek - Generations" is on (the one with both Picard and Kirk).

9:32p - According to 'lisa, Calais is seeing John again. Whatever. He is so cute it hurts, but my nieces well-being comes before my visual evaluation!

9:35p - I just checked the liquid I am rendering. It is not sufficiently rendered down yet. Did I mention that I have a couple of peanuts growing? I do. They are growing in my planters. It will be interesting to see how the go.

9:36p - I took Kira for a walk in the park this afternoon. I let her run free for a bit. She loves that. It lets her get a good work out too.

9:38p - I have done nothing today. So bored. Kira is making weird sounds as though she is having respiratory distress. I think it is nothing. She does this on occasion.

9:39p - I am so bored. I think I should fix my food and take it down to the Promenade to eat. (we will see!).

9:40p - Ahhh... the Enterprise is crashing again. I remember the first time I saw this movie; it was in Vero Beach. I was participating in a "Klingon" event. They paid us (in pizza and movies) to do the event. It was another of the fun times that I reminisce about.

9:51p - Oh, well. Whatever. I will figure something out.

Monday - June 17, 2002

7:37a - I weighed in at 223 again this morning. My weight just doesn't seem to change. I have STILL not had a regular soda since the beginning of the month.

7:44a - I had weird dreams this morning. Most of the had lots of people in them too.

When I was walking Kira, there was some man who came up to speak to me. Very strange. He was wearing a pro-American t-shirt and asked me if I was a journalist. I told him no and he said something about I seemed to have some of those "sissified ways the politicians are teaching" these days. I kind of looked at him askance and assured him I knew nothing of that. He went on in a similar fashion, mentioning something about "queers" ... then asked me for .75 cents for a cup of coffee. Very strange. He finally wandered off.

It was hectic at work this morning. I logged 35 calls today. Most of them before noon. (Another hacker attacked MSCNS).

I was so bored when I came home this evening, so walked down to Hannegan's and had a few cocktails and one shrimp cocktail. That was $40 dollars practically thrown away. I did meet the bartender, Leo, who is from Brazil and was very interested in learning Esperanto. Maybe he would like to join us local Esperantistoj.

Tuesday - June 18, 2002

7:42a - I don't have any bananas left. I have been taking one with me for breakfast when I walk Kira. I have a couple at work though. I will just have to be patient.

7:43 - I look like another beautiful day in the making outside this morning.

8:08 - Kira saw a squirrel this morning. It scurried up a wall, slipped and fell again. Which got Kira all excited. She was jumping up & down barking. It just cracks me up. This lad was out there at the time looking for the Radisson. I showed her how to cross over the Promenade to get there.

8:27a - I am still 223 lbs. I have still not had a regular soda and haven't had any beer in over a week. I have a banana for breakfast, a salad for lunch and for supper last night (as an example) I had a can of spinach with some left over rice. I should be losing weight, but so far no change. Well, like Cheryl at work said to me yesterday, "You didn't put it on over night either, did you?" However, this morning I am craving hot buttered grits and bacon & eggs. (I do not care for traditional breakfast foods, as a rule).

I had a banana for breakfast... and salad and some brussel sprouts for lunch.

Work was not to heavy today; logged 28 calls.

I decided to have some beer tonight. I met Jack over Talayna's and we shared some beer (I didn't over do it). Then we picked up Adam and drove over to my place so I could change and walk Kira. We had decided to go out for supper. We went to Vietnam Palace over on Grand. I was sure I could get something to eat there that would not be TOO fattening/caloric. I ended up getting the #44, which is basically a rice noodle soup with chicken. It was white chicken, boiled, and not too much of it. Lots of broth and a few veggies. They serve a vegetable side dish with is consisting mostly of crispy fresh bean sprouts, cilantro sprigs, and thin slices of fresh jalapeño. It was delicious and still not to far outsides the bounds of my dieting.

Unfortunately, my meal hit a sour spot when I realized I had left my wallet in my other pants! Fortunately, I had just enough cash in my pocket to cover my share of the meal.

Wednesday June 19, 2002

7:24a - I am up early this morning. I had so many weird dreams last night, but I can't remember any of it except one snippet in which Gorgette at work was asking me, "what is the definition of 'goo most foul'?" I had no idea what the question was about, so I answered with, "I don't know, but when I was a kid I stepped in some of it!"

Oh, I just realized that I remember another "snippet" from my dreams. I was back in Lancaster, CA, on the ranch where we used to live. I was following someone by the old house where George Mandis used to live. We were going along behind some bushes and I was explaining to someone that this used to be a secret shortcut when we were kids. The bushes used to be high and dense, but there were now short and sparse. As we got to the end of the hedge and came out near the highway (where I used to wait for the school bus), I notices the field just east of us was now a field of concrete rubble. It had been a huge building, maybe a high-rise, which was now being torn down. There was a weird machine there which looked more like an insect. It was picking up concrete and throwing it onto an overpass (or some such structure) which I now realized was over our heads. The dream changed from that point to some kind of movie reference about some guy getting killed in the cab of some heavy duty equipment by shooting a pistol at some of the controls (instead of pushing them by hand) and being hit by a ricochet. Very strange dreams!

7:35a - Time to take Kira out.

7:39a - WEIGHT= 223

7:59a - It was very nice outside. Kira didn't see a squirrel, but she did play with a fallen Magnolia blossom.

I was a fairly good day at work today, but this evening turned into a nightmare. Probably one of the worst days of my life in St. Louis so far. I don't even want to write about it right now. Just suffice it to say that I am not harmed and will be fine, and no one else including Kira has suffered any injury, but I am missing work tomorrow over this. I am so stressed out.

Thursday June 20, 2002

8:12a - I got up and walked Kira, but I did not get to bed until about 4:00a, so I am exhausted. Y'entw' aoch' uut' aav' ey' uufy' iinksdr' aastlaitn' aanje Jack emk' uut' ivg' iim' ey' aidr' ome. Aany' iith' ew' ome, iiw' iidaitsej' uut' og' uut' iithe Taquería uut' iiche. Che aasw' os' aadbe nwe iith' opiisl' uldp' ush' oyaev' aanj' ukte Jack uut' eilje! Y'aad' uut' epe $350 uute t'g' im' aoche! Y'idaenche t'g 'ome nyaelt' afyaerte 4:00am ny'iith'ornmeingne. Y'iilf' os' aadbe 'yaotbe ch' aalye. I am so stressed out about it all. It is just all so wrong. I feel nauseous, tired and spaced out. Not to mentioned guilty, concerned and in shock.

10:06p - I tried to sleep today. I slept some, but fitfully. I got up about 2ish and the phone rang. It was Jack. He wanted to see if I wanted to join him The Vital Voice  (a local newspaper where he works) to stuff bags with pamphlets & papers to hand out at the festival in the park this weekend. I feel like I have done penance and feel a little better about myself.

10:17p - Skip is up. About time for me to go to bed. I had a slab of baked Salmon for supper. It was delicious. Jack and I went to Shop & Save tonight and I bout the Salmon for about $4.98/lb. I only cooked half of it too! I also got some Red Snapper (frozen). And I got some sandwich makings for this weekend. I am going to make sandwiches and taken the to PrideFest on Sunday. This will be my third time to attend.

10:20p - Oh... I gave Kira a very good bath today. I hope she is less itchy/scratchy than she has been.

10:21p - I hope to get a good night's sleep tonight and I should be well and good to go back to work tomorrow. I hated to miss a day today, but I was so tired and stressed out. I just could not handle it. I did actually go on line and take care of a few items remotely, but I don't really get "credit" or "paid" for that.

Friday - June 21, 2002
Happy Litha!
(summer solstice)

8:12a - I guess I am ready for work now. Yesterday was the pits. I was so depressed, and so was Jack. But the sun is shining and its another day. Life goes on and we will put this unfortunate occurrence behind us. Our friendship is still in tact, and that's what counts more than anything.

My next door neighbor, Diana, and I went out tonight. We went to the Broadway Oyster bar. I had a dozen oysters and they were very well done. Broken from the shell and very plump (not like the little dinky things one gets at Hooter's, which also have to be pried loose from the shell). They had a live rock band playing and were celebrating something we did not understand; Fete 2002, I beleive it was called. We had a few drinks, and Diana had their Jambalaya (with a crawdad on top). We left and I went down to Clem's where I had a few drinks and later caught a cab home.

I cooked the other half of my Salmon steak when I got home. It was so delicious!

Saturday - June 22, 2002

I did not do much of anything today. I should have done laundry. I mostly sat around munching and watching TV. I fixed one of the Red Snapper fillets with rice for supper tonight. It was good, but not as good as the Salmon.

Sunday - June 23, 2002

8:38a - I am getting ready to take Kira out, the I must come back in and begin making sandwiches for our picnic today.

10:04p - Jack loved my sandwiches. That was cool. However, he completely forgot that Kira was supposed to be accompanying us seemed to be .... well, a bit irritated the fact. He managed to hide well enough, but then I discovered that he intended for me to be his "modeling agent" (or whatever one might call it). I had no problem with doing this, but I did NOT realize that it would be expected of me. Anyway, I spent the entire day trying to lug Kira around, get modeling "subjects" to sign a release and then I discovered that on top of everything thing else, I had forgotten my wallet. I never got a chance to take a single picture, which is one of my few hobbies and favourite pastimes. We were so tired by the time Judy Tenuta was to perform that we decided to leave (around 3:00ish). At least I got out and got some good exercise and a little sun. Kira also got to get out and do something for a change. But as PrideFests go, it was the least fun of the times I've attended.

10:11p - Actually, it was a pleasant day, even if Kira and I were both exhausted. I came home and went up to the pool where I spent a very pleasant evening sipping on wine spritzers (mixed with grape soda - sounds awful, tastes good). Later I took Kira for a long walk. We went through a stroll through the "falls" at the local "fountain" and scared some black people from East St. Louis who were (sadly) afraid of dogs.

Jack took over 300 pictures today!!!

10:15p - Skip just got up and is fixing some coffee. I was wondering way, then I realized it is after 10:00p. He has to go to work. How sad... the work week is already beginning again! Oh well. On the bright side, Chuck will be here soon! It will be so cool to have him here visiting!!

Monday - June 24, 2002

7:40a - I got a good deal of sun yesterday. Now if I could just make some progress in the weight loss department. I just weighed myself and I am STILL only 223 lbs. All I had to eat yesterday was 3 sandwiches.

7:43a - I had strange dreams last night. In one, I had to move a big semi-truck and did not know how. I was very stressful. In another, there were fire everywhere and peoples homes were being destroyed. My home was among them. I was walking down this road and found a walkway (to the left side), which ran along a stream. Then I ended up in the offices some kind of city official. They had a map out and were trying to determine the location of my home and my preferred escape route. I looked at the map and realized that they were showing the route that I took to get to their location. Very strange dream. Then I woke up this morning and on the news they were talking about a major fire in Colorado which was burning people out of theirs homes. Very, VERY strange!

7:48a - There were more dreams, but there were so complicated I don't think I could begin to explain them.

I got 35 calls logged today, it was fairly busy.

Jack picked me up after work and we went over to see the lawyer to go over what various kinds of hells he would be put through. There are a lot of hoops to be jumped through. And lots of money to pay (of course). This entire situation is so ridiculous. A year ago the little alcohol limit was 1.01. Jack probably would not have had to go through this. This year it is .08 ... now he is considered a criminal. I feel so guilty about the entire situation since he was coming to pick me up. Of course, I was going to take a taxi home and I realize that Jack is responsible for his own actions, but it would not have happened if it were not for me. Oh well... spilled milk, etc....

Anyway, we both liked the lawyer and his rates were very reasonable.

We stopped at Crazy Bowls to eat on the way home. I was worried about Kira since she had to go for her evening walk, but we then ran by Schnuck's where I picked up a few groceries. I did not make it home until 9:30pm ... Kira had managed quite well, fortunately. I also found a $20 bill laying on the ground while walking her. I was worried at first that it fell out of my pocket, but the more I think about it, I am sure I did not have a $20 in my pocket. I had two 20's in wallet at Crazy Bowls earlier and pulled one out to pay for my food then. I still have the remaining 20, so I am fairly certain this did not fall from my pocket.

Tuesday - June 25, 2002

7:18a - The sun is just coming up and eating through the haze. It look dark when I first got up.

8:03a - It is back to being overcast. I just got back in with Kira. It will surely rain today. I am glad I am keeping an umbrella in my satchel again.

It was a rainy day or most of the day. I only logged 19 calls. Carl called me with printer problems. I may go over to his place again to look at his system tomorrow.

I had a salad for lunch but someone brought a couple of "white castle" cheeseburgers for me! I refused them and gave them away, but they were left on my desk and around 5pm I gave in to temptation and ate them! I tried :( For supper I had some sauerkraut and rice (with tomato and onion cooked in it). I also drank some beer tonight (I am getting sick of wine).

Chuck notified me he is getting a room at the Holiday Inn over on 9th street, about 5 blocks from here. That will be good. He will be close by, but will still have his privacy and we will not be overcrowded.

Wednesday - June 26, 2002

7:42a - It is bright and sunny this morning, unlike yesterday. But I am not in a good mood. I did not sleep well again, I has stressful dreams and sleeping felt like a chore. I am tired this morning and don't feel good. Maybe it will go away.

8:14a - I met my new neighbor from across the hall again today. I keep forgetting her name. I asked her (again) and it is "Connie" ... Connie, Connie, Connie.... I am going to remember it this time. I hate it when I forget a name. Especially considering how much I paid for the huge bottle of Ginkgo Biloba that I have been taking regularly!

I am still 223 lbs!!! I may as well give up dieting. I've been going all month and haven't lost a pound. I could do more; like more exercise and reduce the food even more, but I still think I should have lost at least a pound or 2 JUST from cutting out regular soda ... and most sugars in general. Almost no fried food, less than half the carbs, and almost no red meats except a little on the weekend. I should have lost at LEAST a little. It is very disheartening. :(

5:57p - What a busy day! I logged 44 calls out of 58 (compared to only 19 calls logged yesterday).

10:53p - I did not accomplish much with Carl's PC tonight. I think his COM port must be fried. And I don't know why his Juno connection keeps dropping. His system is a bit antiquated and his configuration most unorthodox. I could only make guesses like stabs in the dark.

10:57p - I didn't get home until after 9pm. By the time I got Kira fed, something on for supper and rebooted the PC (which locked up) it was about 10:10p.

11:00p - I fixed some rice for supper. I put a bed of onion rings on top of the rice (before cooking), then some lettuce on top of the onions. I took a fillet of Red Snapper and cut it in half. I placed the fish on top of the lettuce and seasoned it with lemon juice, butter flavor, garlic and salt. I haven't tried it yet (its still "steaming") but is looks pretty good. I should be good dietetically too. (Of course, I am drinking some beer tonight too, so that is not good).

11:06p - Tomorrow is cousin Stanley's birthday. I would really like to get in touch with him again. I think he will be 46 years old! (wow...).

Thursday - June 27, 2002

7:45a - I am so sleepy. I had strange dreams again last night. I remember driving a car in Osteen (in the dream). The road was basically a dirt trail. I think I was with Jodi. At one point I was in someone's house... I think.... yes, it was my sister's house (except that it is in California). There was a hypodermic needle laying on the counter, but it was made of some heavy substance. Maybe cast iron. Anyway, it was not clear. For some odd reason I picked it up and poke it painlessly into a vein on my left wrist. I extracted blood, just to see if I could do it. Then I stepped out the back door squirted the blood out. The Darlene found the blood and she was blaming it on their neighbor. I kept my mouth shut and did not admit that it was me. None of it made much sense! Then I was back in Osteen with Jodi again. She was there to get something and I remember she mentioned $300. I was just along for the ride and was not paying attention. At one point, I was standing in someone's kitchen and was doing a ballet-like pirouette. I just kept spinning and spinning. I remember thinking to myself, this what I always do in dreams... its nice to know that I can really do this! (Of course, I thought I was NOT dreaming). Very peculiar.

7:54a - It's getting late. I need to take Kira out. It looks nice out again this morning. Maybe partly cloudy. I got some sun last weekend. I hope to do so again this weekend. I wish I could lose some weight to. I am still trying hard.

I only logged about 13 calls today! That may be a record low.

I got off work and went down to Talayna's where I met Jack. We had a couple of drinks and then he left. I finally gave Robert (who works there) the pictures I had promised him from when "Penny" crashed her car into the bar. He mostly wanted the picture of Jonathan in front of his new Cadillac.

I ran into "Lynn" ... the "chick" that Skip brought home a few months ago who had lost her keys (or some such) and could not get into her apartment. I also met "Igor" ... a local Russian guy (very hunky!) who she (Lynn) was very obviously hitting on. She was even hitting on me. Iiyenve nwe Y'oldt' erhe Y'aasw' eiige! It was hopeless!

I got home around 9:30, walked Kira, fed Kira, then went up to the pool with a beer around 9:30ish. I finally remember the guy named "Tom Mahon" who works here. I called him Tom "McMahon" ... but I was close!! Next time I will know!!

10:03p - Skip just got up.

10:18p - OH!!! Good news! I was down 1/4 pounds this morning!!!! My pants are feeling like they are falling down. I do nt thing my scale is all that accurate.

10:20p - Jack told me today that Adam is going to a job interview in Chicago shortly. We will see how this works out. I think Adam is getting ums' airdt' aavye Jack. However, iih' uzdench' one che. Actually, I have to admit that Y'ond' on' iithyaerthe. It is very confusing. Sorry if you don't understand the Ashoke commentary. This is my "diary/journal" and I have to have SOME (public) privacy!

10:54p - Supper was okay. I've been thinking about the incident with Jack and it is bothering me more and more. I only bought him one shot and he only drank 1/2 of it. I am sorry I bought it when he said he did not need any more, but he only drank 1/2 of it. I am having second thoughts about all the money I am spending on his behalf.

11:04p - Skip just left for work. We were discussing the fact that when he goes into the grocery store he make him leave his bag at the front desk. This has hit me before too. I makes me very angry. Women go into the store with their purses and don't have to leave them at the front desk... it seems like gender discrimination to us. It has happened to me before too. Its just WRONG!!

Friday - June 28, 2002

7:45a - My weight is down to about 222.5 now. I am so glad it is Friday. Y'adh' uut' onl' ums' unmein' uute Jack uutaitne. I am glad it is payday!

I went partying with Tom who works here in the building tonight. What an unexpected occurrence.

Saturday - June 29, 2002

I did not feel too well all day. I bit of a hangover. I probably gained back all the weight that I lost. All I wanted to do all day was to eat and watch TV. I did managed to go to the bank this morning and deposit the check that Jack gave me for groceries last week, and the I got my hair cut at 11:00am. Other than that, checking my email was the most strenuous thing I could must for the rest of the day!

Sunday - June 30, 2002

I tried to make up for some lost time today. I got a good nights rest and got domestic this morning. I did laundry, cooked a side of corned beef, vacuumed, cleaned the kitchen, and dusted & waxed. I was done with all of this around 1:30p and decided it was time to relax. I got a bucket, put some cans of beer in it, covered it in ice and went up to the pool. I some new people there today, including Ben, who just moved in last night.

I got a lot of sun and decided to go to the bar for a while. I got there and only had one beer, a couple of Red Bulls and a bottle of Dosani water. I got bored and went home. I was feeling uncomfortable from all the sun I got today.

I am not feeling well! I got sunburned really bad. I am shivering and burning up at the same time. This sucks.

My final weight reading for this month is back to 223 lbs. (just a fraction under, actually).

C A L E N D A R